Perfect Timing

Apologies in advance if this post is a little all over the place... so am I.

Well, this time next week we'll be "on the other side" and hopefully celebrating a successful and complication free surgery. I mentioned we'd be busy but I am shocked at how quickly this surgery is approaching... Especially since it felt like it was going to be an eternity when they said "November 12th." But here we are, counting down the final days.

My normal response to stress is to clean, organize, etc... more so than normal. (The nesting phase of pregnancy was absolutely my favorite... Or maybe moving was?) So this week I have made a million to-do lists. In addition to unpacking from our weekend getaway and preparing for our visitors coming this weekend, I've scheduled the carpet cleaners to come in while Finn is in the hospital, cooked 2 batches of soup in the slow-cooker, organized all of his toys, and made a 3 page document about the house for my mom.  I am quite good at staying busy when I'd rather not think about the hard stuff. At least my coping mechanism results in a clean house, right?

Anyway, tomorrow morning is our pre-op appointment. Busy or not, things will begin to feel very real again as I drive up to the hospital. I am certain emotions will be heightened in the coming days. 

Exhibit A:

I am not a crier. (Just ask my husband or my sister.) But I just watched this video on Huffington Post and I was a mess.  I quickly sent it to all my mom friends... and my own mom... and mother in law.

Take a look:

The Video Every Mom Must Watch On Repeat Until She Gets It

Maybe it was the early morning with a sick baby, or just hormones, but it got me. And it was exactly what I needed today.

As nervous as I am about this procedure, I am 10 times more nervous about Finn coming home. (Moms - remember that feeling you had after your baby was born and you wanted to stay in the hospital forever?) That perfectionist side of me is terrified of doing something wrong. What if he bangs his head? What if he can't sleep? What if I get frustrated that he can't sleep? What if I mess up his pain meds or his incision gets infected? I am not a nurse! (Luckily Mema is and will be here the better part of November. Thank you, mom!) I am so afraid of seeing this little man hurting and not knowing how to help him.

Unfortunately, there is no manual for this type of thing. There is just our way of dealing with it. That video reminded me that I may never be perfect and I may mess up alot; but in the end, no one is more qualified to care for him Finn than Brian and me. Hopefully just being there for him will be medicine enough. 

A good laugh and a long sleep are the best cures in the doctor's book. ~ Irish Proverb

If you are too busy to laugh, you are too busy. ~ Proverb