First off, I have been in touch with a fellow Atlanta mom whose 4 month old is having surgery today for sagittal. I feel for her. I know what she's going through and how scared and helpless she feels. If only she could skip the next few hours and days and have her perfect little baby back. A simple request to please keep Mason and the Robertsons in your prayers today and in the coming days as he heals!
As I sit and worry about fellow mom, I am in shock that 4 weeks have gone by since our little man was taken off to the OR. I am so grateful that we have made it to this point with no major setbacks. But since I am here worrying again, I have to admit that I am still scared for Finn. I know the hardest parts are behind us but I worry about the future and potential surgeries down the road. I am also scared of having another cranio baby or a baby with a different condition that is much more severe. I don't know if I can go through it again. Do all moms live in fear or is it just me?
This has been one of the most challenging years of my life. (That is hard to say when you lose a sibling at the age of 18.) Sometimes I feel like the hits just keep on coming. Then I try to remind myself that I am still extremely blessed. I have my health, a beautiful home, a loving husband and family who are more supportive than you can imagine, wonderful friends near and far, clothes on my back, presents under the tree. Why do we sometimes lose sight of all the good in our life and become so overwhelmed with the less than good?
Becoming an adult is not easy. Becoming a parent is not easy. Maintaining a life and a relationship when life hands you lemons is definitely not easy. But I pray that I've grown from these challenges. I know there have been circumstances in the past that have made me stronger as a person. I hope I can say the same for this year. I want to go into 2014 with a clear head and positive mind.
I am committed to ending 2013 on a high note! I am so glad that we end the year with Christmas. It is my absolute favorite time of year. I will definitely be one of those parents that goes all out. Brian has already had to remind me a few times that Finn won't really understand Christmas yet and we don't need to go overboard. I credit my mom for this personality trait. She continues to spoil us every Christmas!
It is hard to believe we are approaching our 2nd Christmas with Finn and 3rd with Cody! We have a tradition of taking Cody for photos with Santa at his vet's office each year. (Finn has yet to have a professional photo with Santa by the way. Priorities.)
Here is us last Saturday with Santa, AKA - Dr. Duffy (no relation), and Finn's new favorite toy, the toothbrush.
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Sorry if that post was depressing or just plain all over the place. It was a little more personal than usual but c'est la vie. Blame the 10 straight days of rain.
Wishing you all a blessed Christmas, lots of love and laughter through the holidays, and a happy and healthy New Year!
As a mom of a bi coronal baby I share that fear. We stopped after our daughter(who's 7 now) was born, opting for a tubal for me(we had a healthy son prior). I told my husband flat out I couldn't do this twice, we've had 2 surgeries on her skull and three for tube for her ears, plus an army of specialists. Once was enough and her health is precious, so I've accepted my limits and am just grateful now. Had I more patience and less fear I might have had another but decided we were good where we were. I think about that now and again as they get older but I'm still confident(especially as her needs evolve), that we made the right call. I think it's different for everyone and you'll K ow what's right :hug:
ReplyDeleteAhh typos!!! *tunes
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Some days...lol